Colin Linneweber's New York Yankees Fan Profile

Bobby Lashley Would Dominate The UFC & Wang, Hughes & Mariano Rivera Are The Keys To A Yanks Championship posted on 07/02/2009

Bobby Lashley Would Dominate The UFC 

Former WWE and ECW champion Bobby “The Dominator” Lashley pulverized mixed martial arts veteran fighter Bob “The Beast” Sapp via TKO less than two minutes into their bout Saturday night at “Ultimate Chaos” in Biloxi, Miss. Moments after the opening bell rang, Lashley (4-0) easily grappled the enormous Sapp (10-5-1) to the canvas.  

Once Lashley, 32, seized the advantage, he connected with a vicious barrage of punches on Sapp, 35, until the onetime PRIDE and K-1 star tapped the mat to signal to the referee that he wanted the fight called at 1:17 of the first round.

"I got a good shot in the eye and was unable to see," explained the onetime University of Washington offensive lineman who was chosen by the Chicago Bears in the third round of the 1997 NFL Draft. "He got me in the eye. No excuses, He got me down today and controlled it. Give it up to Bobby Lashley."

Continue reading "Bobby Lashley Would Dominate The UFC & Wang, Hughes & Mariano Rivera Are The Keys To A Yanks Championship"
(0 comments)

There Will Be No Homoerotic Riverdance for Papelbon This Fall posted on 07/01/2009
The New York Yankees defeated the Seattle Mariners 8-5 Tuesday night in the Bronx to move 12 games over .500 for the first time this season.

Yankees hurler Joba Chamberlain (4-2, 3.89 ERA) yielded three runs on nine hits over 5-1/3 innings to help the Yankees notch their sixth straight victory in the no-decision.

Bombers Manager Joe Girardi said he is pleased with Chamberlain’s efforts to date and he insinuated that he is not worried his precocious ace will cower under pressure and begin to smoke meth with his estranged mother, Jacqueline Standley.

"The bottom line is we're 10-5 in his starts," said Girardi, one of the most unlikable leaders the field of athletics has seen since John Goodman’s character in Revenge of the Nerds.

Continue reading "There Will Be No Homoerotic Riverdance for Papelbon This Fall"
(0 comments)

Jim Leyritz Will Soon Be Living in a “Federal Pound-Me-In-The-Ass Prison” posted on 07/01/2009
Clown pocket New York Yankees playoff hero of yesteryear Jim Leyritz is determined to prove that he is innocent of a DUI manslaughter charge that stems from a December 2007 automobile crash in Fort Lauderdale that killed Fedia Ann Veitch, a mother of two children.

"There was no possibility of me avoiding that crash with all of my senses," Leyritz, 45, told The Miami Herald last weekend despite the fact that he operated his SUV chemically inconvenienced with a blood-alcohol level that rivaled Nicholas Cage’s character in Leaving Las Vegas.

"A mother was taken away from her kids. I can't change that. But I didn't do it. The accident did. And that accident wasn't my fault."

The pulsating cock that is Jim Leyritz, a career .264 hitter who played on seven teams in 11 seasons, reportedly morphed his liver into a prune slamming Grey Goose vodka and tonics while he tried to seduce Playboy pin-up Erica Chevillar at a local club that fateful evening.

Continue reading "Jim Leyritz Will Soon Be Living in a “Federal Pound-Me-In-The-Ass Prison”"
(0 comments)

Bobby Lashley Would "Dominate" The UFC posted on 06/30/2009
Former WWE and ECW champion Bobby “The Dominator” Lashley pulverized mixed martial arts veteran fighter Bob “The Beast” Sapp via TKO less than two minutes into their bout Saturday night at “Ultimate Chaos” in Biloxi, Miss.

Moments after the opening bell rang, Lashley (4-0) easily grappled the enormous Sapp (10-5-1) to the canvas.

Once Lashley, 32, seized the advantage, he connected with a vicious barrage of punches on Sapp, 35, until the onetime PRIDE and K-1 star tapped the mat to signal to the referee that he wanted the fight called at 1:17 of the first round.

"I got a good shot in the eye and was unable to see," explained the onetime University of Washington offensive lineman who was chosen by the Chicago Bears in the third round of the 1997 NFL Draft. "He got me in the eye. No excuses, He got me down today and controlled it. Give it up to Bobby Lashley."

Continue reading "Bobby Lashley Would "Dominate" The UFC"
(0 comments)

Yanks Championship Hopes Rest on Wang, Hughes and Mariano Rivera posted on 06/29/2009

In last night’s 2009 Subway Series finale at Citi Field in Queens, the New York Yankees defeated the New York Metropolitans 4-2 to capture five out of the six games played between the cross-town rivals this year.

Erstwhile Yankees ace pitcher Chien-Ming Wang (1-6, 10.06 ERA) yielded two runs on four hits over 5-1/3 innings to earn his first victory since he suffered a season-ending foot injury running the bases in Houston against the Astros last June.

Wang, 29, entered the season with a .754 winning percentage (46-15) that was the best mark among active hurlers from 2006-2008 with a minimum of 60 starts.

However, Wang’s severely fractured foot was clearly not entirely healed at the start of the 2009 campaign and his putrid numbers emphasized that reality. In his first three starts, Wang went 0-3 and compiled an unsightly 34.50 ERA before he was placed on the disabled list in late-April.

Continue reading "Yanks Championship Hopes Rest on Wang, Hughes and Mariano Rivera"
(0 comments)