INJURIES TO YANKS HUGHES & KENNEDY AS REAL AS PAM ANDERSON'S TITS
New York Yankees prized farmhands Phil Hughes and Ian Kennedy have both been on the disabled list since Bob Shepherd’s high school days and even some of the most ardent Bombers fans are perplexed at how such minuscule injuries could shelve the two rookies for such extended periods of time.
Yankees Manager Joe Girardi stressed last week that Kennedy (0-3, 7.41 ERA), 23, who had been sipping pina coladas since early-May with a strained right lat muscle before starting for Class A Tampa 2 weeks ago, is no longer rehabilitating his wound.
“This is him getting right,” Girardi said. “He’s not on the D.L. now. This is him earning his way back, just like the other 175 players or so in the minors.”
Meanwhile, Hughes (0-4, 9.00 ERA), 22, is expected to lounge around until September with a strained oblique and cracked rib that was first identified in April.
Many question with reason how such benign scratches have essentially cost the Bombers ballyhooed arms an entire major league baseball season.
In actuality, the answer is quite elementary and simple. “Ike’s” and “Phil Franchise’s” traumas are as legitimate as Pam Anderson’s tits and Yankee brass is doing everything in their powers to keep the kids from further embarrassing themselves on the professional level.
One will believe what they choose to. But, that is the truth of the matter and sometimes the truth hurts. Well, the truth definitely hurts more than the youngsters nicks.
ROY JONES WILL SPEAK LIKE REGINALD DENNY SOON
Light Heavyweight Champion Joe Calzaghe (45-0, 32 KOs) will defend his crown and fight Roy Jones Jr. on September 20 at New York’s Madison Square Garden it was announced Tuesday.
After Calzaghe, 36, defeated the legendary Bernard “The Executioner” Hopkins (48-5-1) in April, “the Pride of Wales” positioned his sights on fighting Jones, 39.
“Joe called me out and it’s hard for me to turn that down,” said Jones, the man who the Boxing Writer’s Association of America chose as the 1990’s Fighter of the Decade.
“I didn’t need the fight, but he asked for it and it’s hard to turn down that opportunity when he’s such a credible and worthy champion. You ask me to fight, you’re a champion and you’re 45-0? That’s the kind of stuff I like to do, you feel me? I think Joe is a true champion and I think he really is going to fight me. I want to get back to the pound-for-pound list and this is the shortcut. I beat Joe, I’m back on top.”
Junior, who resurrected his career by dominating Felix Trinidad (42-3) in January, is already looking past his fight versus Calzaghe and claiming that he wants to box WBC Champion Samuel Peter (30-1) after he dethrones the British southpaw in the fall.
“They call Samuel Peter ‘The Nightmare,’” Jones said. “I’ll give him a nightmare. I like to do stuff people think I can’t do.”
There is zero dispute that Jones, who became the first middleweight to win a piece of the heavyweight championship when he outclassed former titleholder John Ruiz in 2003, is a pugilist for the ages.
Nevertheless, Junior suffered two savage knockouts in 2004 against light heavyweights Antonio Tarver and Glen Johnson and he needs to proceed with his future plans with greater caution than he currently is.
Peter is one of the strongest punchers in the heavyweight division and any one of his haymakers could make Jones forever speak like that poor sap Reginald Denny. For a bright and sharp-witted man like Junior, that should be his biggest “nightmare” of all.
BARKLEY FOR GOVERNOR
Former Philadelphia 76ers and Phoenix Suns star Charles Barkley participated in a celebrity poker tournament in Las Vegas last week despite claiming before the event that he was through with gambling and instead focusing on drinking alcohol.
“I can’t gamble, so I gotta drink,” said Barkley, 45, who was sued in May by Wynn casino for failing to pay back gambling loans. “Can you imagine how bad life would be if you couldn’t gamble or drink?”
"The Round Mound of Rebound,” who has projected his lifetime gambling losses to be in excess of $10 million, declared a year ago that he intends to run as an Independent for Governor of Alabama in 2014.
I have never fancied myself as a political junkie and I frankly know zero about Barkley’s political ideals and values. But, I do know that if “Sir Charles” has any sincere desire to run the Yellowhammer State then he needs to begin speaking publicly like a man who actually wants to run for office.
If Barkley doesn’t curtail his brazen remarks and lifestyle, he can kiss his dreams of leading the “Heart of Dixie” goodbye.
Keywords: Charles Barkley & Boxing, New York Yankees
Comments
Cupcake, you're estrogen prescription is ready.
"ballyhooed" ???
we will chalk that up with deadpanned
Roy Jones is bright???? Jesus fuggin Christ..........just when i thought you couldn't say anything more incorrect, you go and state this.........
Stick to postseason RBI statistical comparisons between GayRod and DiceK and you'll be fine.......cupcake.
“I didn’t need the fight, but he asked for it and it’s hard to turn down that opportunity when he’s such a credible and worthy champion. You ask me to fight, you’re a champion and you’re 45-0? That’s the kind of stuff I like to do, you feel me? I think Joe is a true champion and I think he really is going to fight me. I want to get back to the pound-for-pound list and this is the shortcut. I beat Joe, I’m back on top.”
Is Roy Jones quoting Omar Little here? Is he referring to Prop Joe?
Colin, can i have my pink undies back now? They're my favorites.....
Hammer, guilty as charged.
The CVS post is my alltime favorite, i couldn't resist.
Phil Hughes is my Cy Young selection at the all star break.....just as Cupcake predicted.
Side note: The "mediocre" DiceK is 9-1 with a 2.84 ERA.
Barkeley will have a lot of trouble after he said that Evangelicals are fake Christians. That would help him a lot up here, but will def hurt him in Alabama. That is pretty offensive expecially coming from an alcoholic, womanizing, gambler.
God bless y'all.